Monk Wisdom Series: Winning is ...... picking the right battle

Days passed by in the Sangha. Sangha was how they addressed the monk community. He learnt about the legacy, of a religion. Buddhism was attributed to a noble man who existed 2600 years ago. The man who was to become the Buddha was born as Siddhartha Gautama .HE existed as a Prince of a small territory near what is now the Indian-Nepalese border. He learnt how he was raised in splendid comfort and style, enjoying aristocratic status. But for this young man these pleasures remained useless. No amount of material pleasure could satisfy the curious and profound nature of the young man. It appalled to him how at such an young age of 29 he left palace and family to search for a deeper meaning in the secluded forests and remote mountains of North-East India. After studying the wisest literature, religious teachers, and philosophers of his time, he took a path of self- mortification, taking that practice to the extremes of asceticism.

It was just the beginning of another beautiful night. The sun was just beginning to find its way behind the mountains far way. The moon on the other hand was overjoyed with the all the space to itself. The clouds slowly shifted their loyalties from the sun to the moon. The transformation in their color said it all. The wide and strong river was flowing undisturbed down below. The water was mindless of the transformation up above. It flowed carelessly oblivious to nature. The disciple had his eyes fixed on the flowing water as he ruminated with his newly gained knowledge. The moon was coming up fast from behind the hills as it was in a hurry . Seeing all this seeded the thought of relationship in his mind. What a relationship he thought. One has to go before the other has to shine. The full moon had the aura of a winner and in its generosity flooded the earth as if it owned it.

These thoughts flashed like a movie in his mind. Winning, he thought. What is the meaning of all this? Does anybody win? Why is winning so important? Nodding his head in disagreement, he once again looked up. Not far away he saw a silhouette approaching him. The flowing robes gave away the personality of his master. Bowing in respect he asked the Master “Is winning so important in life?” The master was kind of expecting a question, took a deep breath and said “depends on what how you consider it. Sometimes you win to lose, while in some other situations you lose to win.” As usual, he saw the now familiar confusion in his disciple’s eyes.

Here is a short story to illustrate it. The two rats were always arguing who was the fastest amongst them. They would have race at every excuse and always it was undecided. This went on for days. They grew up like true rats and never matured. Winning the race always ruled their mind. It was raining heavily in the forest and food had become a scarcity. After several hours of scavenging, they found a bounty. Their find was a bunch of worms and mushrooms stacked by some other animal. Along with the rats there was a tortoise also when they found it. This led to a heated argument to decide who will eat it. They argued for hours. Finally, they hit on a plan. They decided to have a race. The tortoise said, "I know you both are very fast, but we will all race to the other side of the river. Whoever reaches to the other side first gets the food". The rats were game. At the count of three, they were off to a start. The tortoise ambled for a short while and saw the rats shoot into the water. Smartly, he conceded the race, walked back and made sure he had enough food for the next few days. Later he learnt that the rats drowned themselves in water.

Smiling to himself, he thought, “If you win the rat race, you're still a rat.” Winning is not everything, picking up the right battle to win is wisdom

Monk Wisdom Series: Is Absolute Silence...possible ?

Is absolute ‘Silence’ possible……? the disciple wondered sitting on the perch...staring at the the horizon.The birds were coming back home and the getting back into their cozy nests. Mars was shining bright and bold up above amongst the stars. Moving hips decorated the fields far away as women carried the days work back with them. The tormented mind could not make sense of anything at this time. The large pond was brightening up as it reflected the stars and a portion of the moon. By virtue, if there is noise around there must be silence he thought. But again...Does ‘Silence’ really exist ? Can there be ‘Silence’ at all?

Sitting alone and the night hurrying in was becoming worrisome for the disciple with all this confusion in his mind. The mind was giving away to the madness and he desperately swung his eyes in search of the Master. The familiar ochre robe was nowhere to be seen. The path to the monastery looked deserted and was punctuated by a few cows grazing the healthy grass. Then all of a sudden, he saw the silhouette arriving, with an aura of the setting sun following him. His heart leapt in anticipation. He needed an answer to silence his mind. Can you silence your mind? He thought again. At this point he was hopelessly confused.

The Master acknowledged the bow from his disciple and said “ Isn’t it so quiet and peaceful here?”. The disciple had no clue what he was saying. His mind represented a hung state with numerous unanswered questions.

“Is it possible to even experience absolute Silence?” asked the disciple impatiently.

The Master with his usual exuberance answered “Sound is a function of the brain and a subset of your mind. A tree falling in the forest doesn’t make a sound until the acoustic energy or sound waves hit an ear drum whereby a signal is sent to the brain and becomes sound for that entity. Sound to me is just an idea”.

He continued “So absolute silence can be thought of as a quiet mind. An empty mind void of content and when the awareness having nothing happening. To be aware of just nothing !!!! this is Internal Silence. Then you have the happening around you, outside that you have no control on. Everything keeps constantly changing. External Silence is therefore just a theory. To quote the ancient philosopher, Heraclitus, he maintained that everything is in a state of flux. Nothing escapes change of some sort; it is impossible to step into the same river”.

To me it never exists, because you cannot touch it, feel it, imagine it, taste it, dream about it……To say you cannot hear Silence, is an oxymoron, it's like saying 'Thinking about Nothing.'

The disciple just understood a part of it. He decided to challenge the Master again some other time. For now he just believed, Silence is elusive and looked forward to empty his mind of all other confusion.

Once he did that, he saw the beauty of nature with the Moon painting the landscape with its golden rays illuminating the dark cloud. As the clouds moved, the perspective changed and he hoped that as he matured in the monastery his perspective would change as well. Jerking his shoulders…Sigh(lence)…followed…

Romance in the Train

In college and living away from home can be lonely. Every quarter I enjoyed my visit back home. Traveling by train was challenging, but in your teens, can be romantic and exciting.

Several trips later, I was enjoying the time of my life - alone excited that I will be meeting friends and family. Once in a while, I missed the warmth that seemed to exude from this small family. I wasn’t lonely really, I had done so many visits back and forth that when I sat in the train I was used to seeing things from a bit of a romantic point of view during my journey. Don’t really know why, but that was the case with me. As I was seated, I was always seeing so many things I wanted to share with someone. I just didn’t have that someone to share with.

For an instant, that young girl across, looked at me making eye contact. I froze. I remember being still like a deer in the headlights. She seemed to be seeing right through me, as if to say she knew my heart,thoughts and desires. We looked at one another for a moment then she looked away. When she did, I felt something had been taken away from me, something I needed very much. I quickly finished the cola and wandered back to my top berth for a short nap. As I passed the young family I looked down and she looked up and smiled a smile I will never forget. What a beautiful embracing smile.

The nap was great and I woke up refreshed. I could smell the food. I was getting hungry after the nap. I don’t know why I was as hungry as I was? I had done nothing all day, but staring at people. The sun had already set, the coach was beautifully lit, lit by old smoky lights everywhere. It created such a romantic mood; I had a moment of remorse about being by myself. There was music coming from a violin like instrument, but more hoarse…that was being played at the far end of the coach by two beggars who I assumed was of some Gypsy decent. The girl was tall slim and wore a tight fitting black dress with black lace that dripped to her feet. The top was low cut exposing some flesh, enough to generate curiosity. The music was good but not soothing for me and it did spoil my mood and the ambiance

I ordered my meal, as the young family, was seated in front of me. I saw her eyes motioned to her father that she wanted to sit in a specific chair that faced me. As she sat down she looked at me and gave me a radiant smile, one that would melt any man's heart. I blushed red and quickly looked elsewhere as if not bothered by that look. I blushed because of the thoughts that engulfed me. The thoughts during the day, the romantic atmosphere, the lights everything had to be blamed.

I was thinking about her before taking my nap. If I thought she was pretty, she was beautiful at dinner. She had a body that I would describe as perfect. Slim and beautiful with she had smartness dripping all around to cause flood on the coach.

I tried to concentrate on food all the while trying to catch another glimpses of her in between without her seeing me. She noticed me twice looking straight at her and she responded with that beautiful smile. She slowly crossed and uncrossed her legs and I was sure I had soup dribbling down my chin. Then she began to swing her legs up and down in constant motion.

Those legs were enough to stop my heart. My station was fast approaching and I knew I had to talk to her at least once. With the family around I was still apprehensive. Biting nails and moving my fingers through my hair , I was thinking harder and harder…People stood up around me to alight. I had to get up too. I knew it was coming to an end. Another journey over. Thousand images filled my mind from the past 24 hours. Each one had her in them…

Then the inevitable happened. Still punching the keypad on her father’s phone, she came across to me and with her elbow brushed my hip and drew my attention…”Finally”…. I thought, I am going to leave and she wants my attention. Smiling at me with a little mischievous grin, she winked and said “Uncle , can you help me with this game?”. Her father returned and I excused myself standing realizing this small interchange with this little girl had kept me occupied for as long as I was awake.I nodded negatively at her and went towards the door, smiled and alighted and went my way..

As I lay on my bed that night I thought of how beautiful kids are. It does not matter if you know them or not, they are a treat to watch.. as a bundle of selfless thoughts, unbiased, pure reflection of God. How appropriately someone said “Kids are the most valuable natural resource in this world”

Words Worth

My Facebook wall screams,yet very few read:

Words are like autumn leaves, everywhere. Thoughts are like your garden, beautiful. Focus on your thoughts..nourish & nurture them...because they are truly yours...

What about words, they are all around us. And for me if it is out there it is mine.It does not matter if Wordsworth wrote it or Einstein. Everything I hear or see, I make them my own. I can take anything,anytime from anywhere and make them mine.

All this said, I have only one thing more to say :

Thoughts are mine and only mine.Words bring happiness to my thoughts. When happiness crawls in like it does now; I write and say "Thank You" to those words around me..

Listening In

Listening is one of the most profound compliment you can ever give some one. We think living couples need to engage in healthy conversations to have a healthy relationship. I have a different angle to it. Like the rhythm of waves, conversations have to be embedded with Silence. Silence is one of the powerful gestures we have to be able to show or indicate respect,care,empathy,profoundness and contemplation. Often times we are guilty of processing internally while we are talking.

Periods of silence gives us the ability to Listen.Being heard is deeply fulfilling to every partner.There is drama, emotion and intelligence in listening. It plays a role of alchemy in a relationship that helps you discover the elixir of togetherness.Along with listening comes the art of asking good questions, that makes the act of listening 'divine'. Several days back as I was waiting to get my Chipotle, across the room, along the window I could see a father and daughter engaged in a conversation. She was so engaged there was beauty and eloquence to it. I could see her disengaged with her inner self.And I guess that is the key to effective listening.

You have to be outside yourself, unaware, calm and unconditional to make listening effective.

True and Honest relationships are silently built on true conversations and True conversations are those where listening is not merely an act, but deeper awareness.

Aging with a Perspective

Growing old, is an age old experience. An experience that is real and realtime, provided we recognize it.We gain perspective once we open up to the understanding, and the profoundness of life will blow us away. It’s like the air we breathe, unless we are conscious about it - we will not recognize it.

As we grow older, lots of things change and every change is a new experience.One thing everyone knows well? Well, Aging. You grow older and soon you realize people close to you start dying. Friends, Family, Relatives and so on…Death is the ultimate giver of perspective. Then there is the other end. Birth. Your children, their kids, your friends kids and so on…These events provides you with a different emotion…
As time flies, you appreciate little things more than before. Everything comes with experience and as a result – with a perspective. Suddenly you don’t complain about your childhood. You are happy with the pocket money you received while you were a kid, enjoyed all the stories you read, all the books, the games, the clothes…your appreciation never ends…when you talk to your kids. Your perspective has given a new meaning and provided you with the richness of the life you had as a child. More importantly, it also dawns on you that, despite of all the wrong things parents have done, they have got a lot of things right too, in fact many….

With a perspective - I can’t complain about my childhood, as I grew up in a decidedly middle-class suburb in living a decidedly middle-class life. While I may have not gotten everything I wanted (for some reason, some of those memories never seem to leave us), I most certainly got everything I needed. Even if it was often a pair of hand-me down clothes from one of my older cousins. At least I had something different to wear.

My dad was the giver…

Not sure when my dad ever took some rest. Family, relatives, friends,kids,wife in that order was the center of his existence. He left by the morning train everyday bright and cheerful, like a man on a mission and came back late evening with some goodies.

My dad always seemed so very proud when one of his kids came to visit him in the office. He’d take us around and introduce us to his co-workers and boss, and he always seemed to lighten up and be very proud of us. My dad was inherently a kind, gentle soul who has a very social and engaging personality. But when growing up, neither us kids or my mom often didn’t see this side of him.

It felt like my dad worked hard at his job, because I don’t remember a lot of interactions with him after work. He seemed tired a lot, and after dinner he would retire to bed. I blamed the job for that, not him, and vowed that I will never to work in a boring office job, sitting at a desk all day and not interact with my kids. (Yes, I get the irony.)

But as a child, we simply take our parents for granted. We don’t know much about them or their personal lives, and understand only a small part of their personality and background. As we grow up, we start learning more and more about them.
As I aged.. many of my friends would remark to me, “Wow, your dad is really great”. “He knows so many people and has such fantastic memory” and I always thought to myself, “Really? My dad??!...and I would be secretly proud.”

I’ve spent far more time with my dad making new memories now I think about it, than I did as a kid, and for that time and those memories, I am eternally grateful.
I’m thankful for my dad, for providing for us early on, allowing us to have all of the things a family needs in order to feel safe, secure and cared for. He provided us not only with the meaning of family, but also with a never-ending supply of love and pride of a dad for his sons and their achievements over the years. I try to appreciate every moment I spend with him now, as such moments dwindle. To all the dads out there, there is hope. Every moment with your kids today will bear fruit someday

As I placed a rose beside my dad’s photo, what bothers me most today, is that I did not write this blog when he was still alive….Happy Fathers Day!!!!!

Kites

Last night a stray cough woke me up and kept me disturbed. The allergies were at work again. Sleep was around but not near my eyes. It was dark and quiet... my mind was wandering. Again, not sure if I was dreaming or awake.

Then suddenly the scene changed and I was staring at the golden sky almost like liquid gold, decorated with a kite. Ah! yes, it was a kite. As it soared it transported me back to those evenings in my early teens. Kite flying was my passion. It was a constant game of control. Each day ended with a new challenge.No video games, no television, no internet, no girls, no movies could tie me down like the kite did.I dreamt to set free like the kite. There was a burning desire to rise above and soar to explore the medley of the golden clouds

Life's lessons were learnt through this passion. Anyone who's flown a kite knows they don't typically go up in a straight line. They meander left and right--even in loops. Life's journey can feel like this. There are times when I become complacent. I think I have mastered the angles and become disenchanted. But then the wind shows up!

Kite flying, and "Life Walk", continues but lacks heart sometimes. Things can fall because I am not paying attention.Like in kite flying, catching the wind is tricky business, as it is about faith in yourself. The force of a gentle breeze gentle breeze or strong blast cannot be seen. The outstretched flag or swaying trees prove that the wind exists because they have been touched. Eh! like we need to prove God's existence.

Sometimes the wind, without warning, seems to disappear completely, and the kite falls. Quick tugs on the string may reconnect it to the wind. Other times a full-scale sprint in the opposite direction is necessary. Sometimes nothing can be done to alter the course. Some other times,it can be frustrating.

The wind, like God's presence, can seem to be everywhere except where I am. Others seem to be sailing along effortlessly. These are times I must return to the beginning. I need to check my position, angle, speed, then wait again at the prepare -string stage.

But then when the kite returns to the air, I'm filled with wonder and hope.

Noise in Silence

Silence, Still and rising like the Sun
Silence, Still and strong between sounds
Silence, Still and permanent around us
Silence, Still and music at night
Silence, Still and flowing like the Ganges
Silence, Still and shining like the Moon

Silence, Still not lost and is the Essence of Life

Degree of " Experiences"

“You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give” – Khalil Gibran

There are many ways one can “give yourself” for eg. providing food to homeless, DVD players, clothes, helping at the zoo, donate money, working with seniors etc. I chose to give time, and work with special kids, because I find very few understand them. To me working with Jeena is about experiencing life with gifted kids . I say gifted, because they have unique abilities…

Somewhere along the line we view these kids inability to conform to certain behaviors as willful disobedience. We see their inability to focus and complete school work as laziness and unwillingness to try. We were expecting them what they cannot give. We have to realise it is not they - but we are inflexible. We are selfish to see them with a common perspective.

We view our kids through the eyes of the world. The world expects them to behave and learn in the typically accepted manner…except they can't…and we are suppose to know better!!!! Through the exhaustion, frustration and stress involved in parenting a child, we give up on them…much like the world, which does not understand them. I see every parent at Jeena understand their kids. They love them. Unconditional Love!! Believe me, each one is under their blanket of love…
I have enjoyed working with kids of all ages. Every day, kids say something that triggers a little 'teachable moment'. In volunteering at Jeena for Rotation Respite, it gives me that exact opportunity to learn more from these specially gifted kids. They teach you about finer points of life, things you have taken for granted and more importantly they make you aware and realise about them.

My hope with every conversation with these kids is not about knowledge, but about seeing their world with their biases. It gives me great pleasure to hear their opinion or perception of something and see it from a different perspective. To reframe the situation in the truer, newer light.

I won’t forget the day when a friend of mine introduced me to Jeena website and I instantly signed up to jeena-friends group. Since then, I have enjoyed every moment and every opportunity I have had in working with these kids and their parents at Jeena.

Finally a lesson I have learnt : is to be constantly look for, the “combination” that will work for that child. An “opportunity” that will ignite that spirit, that one “thread” that will best connect that young kid to the civil society, a “way” they will be able to contribute to its success for them and for the society.
In Jeena I see an University for continuous learning, not for academic degrees but for gaining what I call it “Degree of Experiences” to make a difference to myself and to this World!!!!

..............written for Jeena's Annual Magazine - JEENA YAHAN 2009

Order in Chaos

Its been there for several thousand years now - We now know what seemed obvious back then. That the basic nature of the universe is its extreme complexity and inexplicable disorder. That mysterious, tangled magnificence popularly known as Chaos exists. The poetic Hindus believed the universe was a dreamy dance of illusion or sometimes referred as Maya. Maya is this mysterious Chaotic existence..

I consider Chaos to be one of the many basis for creativity & innovation.What amazes or intrigues me, is the randomness within Chaos that creates a mystery in our relationships with others and things around us. For e.g. what I see and how I perceive a scene will be totally different from another person. There are so many perceptions and in a chaotic sense, they are all floating around. I believe that your mind then connects with that one and you have your perception. Anyways, as complicated this may seem, for those who see the brighter side, it brings freshness and surprise to us all the time..

For several years now, scientists began to study the complexity within the human brain . When we talk about Chaos, as an example, it turns out that the brain is a galactic network of a hundred billion neurons. Each neuron is an information system as complex as a mainframe computer. Each neuron is connected to ten thousand other neurons. Each of us is equipped with a universe of complexity that is inscrutable to our alphanumeric minds.

This brain power that helps us perceive,feel and think is at once the most humiliating fact about our current ignorance, and the most thrilling prospect of our potential divinity;

To me Chaos provides us with Infinite opportunities. With every bit of chaos comes Order. It just needs the application of our mind. Music for instance seems like noise until you find the pattern. This is also why at times after repeated listening to the same song, makes you like it. Once your reach the state of familiarity there is no more chaos in your mind!!!

We often think we should be able to understand everything about a piece of music on the first hearing. If we don't, then there is either something wrong with us, or with the music. I admit that when I first start listening to some piece of music I somewhat loathe to spend much time on one track. But when I listen to this at least 10 times or more familiarity sets in, order takes its place the brain likes it and associates it with thoughts and feelings...Finally, I love the music.

These repeated listening allows us to memorize...slowly I start having a fabulous time, following the various shifts in motives, harmonies, keys, rhythms, and general characters. Fifteen minutes of doing the dishes had never passed so quickly...

Order inconspicuously rides on Chaos. I have learned to enjoy that state!!!

Creativity

It's been a while I came back to take a look at my blog.Today it is. After a tiring day, I am inspired by the way people think. How tough times bring the best out of us. We find ingenious way to survive, thanks to our creativity...

Certainty keeps creativity at bay
Abundance keeps creativity away

Need brings creativity in play
Challenges provide creativity a new way

American pianist, composer, author, comedian, and actor Oscar Levant said once "There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line"

I see "in every creativity there is hidden insanity" or even better " Insanity is hidden in every creativity"

Feather in the Wind

I think this was Friday night. It was a dream again. I remember thinking I needed to be by myself, and usually I would walk in deep thoughts, this time i remember, I went out on the porch like place, not sure where I was but was a lovely setting. I remember seeing a road down below, deserted with vast expanse of fields surrounding it. There were tea lights that were interspersed among the potted plants as I perched in the swing a hammock……..it felt like a rabbit in a burrow, invisible to anyone driving by. I could see them, but they couldn’t see me. Seemed like I could not see my body, but my mind was illuminated. My eyes reached out far and wide into the horizon. I liked it.

As I quietly sat in the hammock, in my burrow, just sitting, listening and wandering in the sounds of the night, I let my Mind wander where it wanted, not giving attention to any particular thought, not trying to organize them into any rational pattern (some say I never do that to begin with). Whatever delighted me, I thought further enjoyed it and let it go, waiting for another thought to bubble up

As my mind wandered, my attention was drawn to the nighttime sounds around me---- It was what I call "a nocturnal symphony". It cannot be played agian the same way. What an experience. An experience that can be replicated again to me is monotony. Don't ask me why. Don't we remember an unique experience more than our experiences in general? Accidents for example?

I heard a cart, somewhere close by, in the grassland behind me. I focused on its repetitive song, wondering if it ever got tired of the sound it generates every time it moves? Was it sound or music?

After a few minutes, I began following the rhythmic chirping of crickets, so I shut out the sound of the cart, and tried to focus my mind on cricket dialogue, to find a pattern wondering if they ever got tired of creating their Voice

In the distance, I heard dogs barking, so I shut out the crickets to listen to the pitch of the barks, three dogs I discerned, mentally matching each pitch to what the dog might look like, wondering if dogs ever told jokes as they passed their messages through the neighborhood

I then became aware of faint, punctuated lows of cattle not too far away; I shut out the dogs to focus on the cows, wondering if their moos have a purpose all the time, or if they just make moo sounds because they’re cows, and wondering , does it hurt them when they fall and then slowly my mind got distracted and then I turned my mind away.

What a joy it was to have no other thoughts, no future, no past...just the present After spending time listening to each Nature sound, I widened my listening angle to hear all of them at once, in symphony. What an experience

I was feeling like a Feather in the Wind, no pressure, just letting my mind wander,distracted and enjoying the experience

I remember waking up to the jarring note of the alarm. Reality has dawned I figured.

Lessons learned

Yesterday I had the opportunity to volunteer at Jeena. It was a moving experience to take care of kids with Special Needs.

Working with children having special needs teaches important lessons in life. Someone told me you have to be a Saint at heart to work with autistic kids. On the contrary I figured - one will come to the realization that we don't have to be a saint to succeed in meeting the needs of others. I think we will acquire a better understanding of the problems such children face in their development. This awareness is very significant in your future interactions with people around us. I will write more about my perspective some other day, but will end here, saying with just the awareness :
"You will never ever be impatient again when you wait for a blind man crossing the street"

Visual Thoughts

Dreams have been distracting me for years.Some I remember, some I don't.Another interesting thing about dreams, you remember the last one until you dream the next one. Before I can resolve the first, there is another one.They keep tormenting me like this.Some intrigue me, others kindle my thoughts. All this happens in a sinusoidal fashion. The ebb and flow happens every other night I dream. Sivananda (a Hindu Monk) says very beautifully "The sun is the source and the temporary resting place of its rays. The rays emanate from the sun and spread in all directions at the time of sunrise. They enter into the sun at sunset, lose themselves there and come out again at the next sunrise. Even so the state of wakefulness and dream come out from the state of deep sleep and re-enter it and lose themselves there to follow the same course again"

What intrigues me about dreams is the visual aspect of it.I am so able to remember vividly everything that happens in my dream world. It helps me to conceive my ideas and my thoughts in a visual way. It convinces me at that time, but all in a dream. What frustrates me is why cannot I think the way I dream, Visually? We think along the boundaries of the language we are comfortable with. As a result,we limit our thoughts, our ideas reflecting on our creativity and ability to innovate.

On researching I came across the life of Temple Grandin who has been diagnosed with autism.Sometimes it needs disability to achieve the impossible. She thrives on this aspect of thinking Visually. She articulates it more vividly in her paper "Thinking in Pictures"

"Visual imagination has no boundaries. Think like You Dream"

Nothing is Beautiful

Last night I had a dream, there was this wonderful lady walking down the street with a bright smile upon her face. I am trying to remember the street now, but cannot. I know I was walking to school. My school bag was carelessly hanging across my shoulders and I was distracted to everything around. Stopping by the roadside at every little debris on the road inspecting it, I was ambling along when this happened. Coming back to this lady, I noticed her smile, due to the intoxicating effect her brilliant vermilion spot on her forehead, had on my eyes. As she walked, her oil soaked thick black hair was neatly tucked into position.Her shoulders, like a queen's, stayed steady and upright. As I watched her, I was standing staring at her through the bunch of yellow flowers hanging between me and her,only about five foot distance from where I was. Thousand thoughts filled my mind. I just watched her and soon...
With little effort in her strut, she made her way down the sidewalk and out of my view.
She left my sight and I was still struggling to find who she was. Her appearance was distracting, deceiving,intriguing.... She had a compelling quality that I cannot describe. Back to reality, the dream is over but I am still hung over. I don't know if she was real, but her beauty was.

You can ask me about her, but don't ask me about the beauty, "Nothing is beautiful unless you see it"

Nature's Beauty

We all enjoy the colors of autumn leaves. Did you ever wonder how and why a fall leaf changes color? Why a maple leaf turns bright red? Where do the yellows and oranges come from?
During winter, there is not enough light or water for photosynthesis. The trees will rest, and live off the food they stored during the summer. They begin to shut down their food-making factories. The green chlorophyll disappears from the leaves. As the bright green fades away, we begin to see yellow and orange colors. Small amounts of these colors have been in the leaves all along. We just can't see them in the summer, because they are covered up by the green chlorophyll.
Like human nature has shades to it nature outside goes through the same kind of transformation. We appreciate nature!!!

Sunlight and the cool nights of autumn cause the leaves turn this glucose into a red color. The brown color of trees like oaks is made from wastes left in the leaves.It sounds like how we humans react and overreact to situations around us. We are thrilled, happy and satisfied at one thing while we are irritated, irrational and contemptuous about some others.

We see beauty in nature, yet we complain about humans. I read somewhere "The universe is perfect. Nature is perfect. Yet we complain that human nature is imperfect. How can that be?"

For a Change

Why don't I write about Change today. There has been a lot of things written about change. I have a lot of my thoughts and perspectives too, someday I can write a book..but thats for later.

There are philosophies, ideas, comments, theories on Change. I won't mess with any one of them, but just want to let my thoughts free ..on Change. Reorg is in the air at work. Earlier I used to worry about them and try to be under the radar and hope for the best. But now I like to think, transitions can be the best thing to happen for one. Come to think of it most of revolutions have happened during transitions. Internet is a prime example. It was difficult to believe we don't often receive letters by snail mail any more. The prediction in the future is that, there will be even lesser and lesser letters via snail mail. I am happy I lived through this transition. I can talk about and have my perspective on them some day. But Change Happens and we adapt...

Each of us have our own pet theories of how the world works, different people can look at the same situation, and come to completely different conclusions about what's likely to happen next. Since these often unspoken understandings are among the things futurists are trained to look for, I thought I'd offer a short list of reasons for change

Change Happens for Power
Change Happens for Ideas
Change Happens for Progress
Change Happens for Markets

Change Happens in Conflicts
Change Happens in Cycles
Change Happens in Evolution
Change Happens in Chaos

Finally in closing I want to share an interesting quote that resonated with me..

Change is the nature of life but challenge is the future of life. So challenge the changes. Never change the challenges..
--- Amitabh Bachchan
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amitabh_Bachchan

Cooking Philosophy

I agree that a lot of philosophy is highly speculative. Some of it is skeptical, and some downright absurd. Then there is the awe factor. Who are we listening to? What's the hype around whom we are listening to ? What the organization they belong to? Godmen and women have made preaching into a business.Cooking Philosophy, as I like to call it. A business of lifestyle. We have now speeches and philosophy written for them to preach, agents to publicize their charm, their social services, create groups.....has become a business. It is easy once we have that herd mentality working for you.

Speaking of which, I was highly impressed by this couple (http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/India/Indians_win_alternative_Nobel/articleshow/3553212.cms)If you decide to know what people really believe about the world, watch how they act. That is the absolute truth of their belief.

You can get a chance to study your own beliefs about the world by taking up cooking. Cooking is a marvelous art,craft with a little bit of science, which can only be accomplished successfully by the application of clear thinking, sometimes vague knowledge, some experience and a great deal of intuition. One thing is clear: when you slide a sizzler to the plate and taste it you realize what a profoundly good thing you’ve made, there is no doubt at all that you have mastered the art, science, and philosophy of interacting with reality. There is no other way to cook. Every experience is different. Each one is unique. Every comment is a variety.Irrespective of where they come from and how they react, it meets a common objective. Satisfy your hunger, fill your stomach!!! Is there a greater philosophy than this?

Tribute to Appa (Dad)

-------------- Athangarai, Chittur, Palghat Kerala, year 2005

Like every once in a while...last night Appa was in my dreams. Could not resist penning my thoughts on my last trip to India with him.One of those visits that made him happy and proud of his children. I remember he said that don't know when we will all be together again at this place..Anyways, here is one from the Diary of my Thoughts..

Ooor vandachu! he muttered. He had spent 18 years of his life in this land 75 years ago. My father, a man even at this age was stubbornly guiding the taxi driver as the old car crawled into the village. “Go straight to the ganapathian (Hindu God) kovil (temple) near the ‘Athangarai’ (the River), he ordered with authority. His wrinkles formed a strange pattern of excitement on his face. His eyes had seen several summers of hectic activity in this little village - Chittur. As little children they had infested the wall around the large motherly banyan tree guarding the kovil. As the wind traveled, this tree made a ‘pause’ of it and punctuated the days with cool refreshing breeze with the busy but soothing, sound of the leaves. Today after almost a hundred years, the ‘Alantharai (place where people get together for a siesta under a huge banyan tree)’ as it is commonly known was staunch and defiant as only it can be.

From those mischievous days as kids in the beginning of the century to the exodus of the grown up Iyers (sect of people), it has been a witness to all and everything. Today my Appa’s(dad) tired, partially blind eyes looked at the receding river from the top and lamented. I could see the moistness filling them. I had never seen this stern character so vulnerable. Over the years he had been a guiding and a motivating force for all those around him Be it college admissions, marriages, poonal, shashtiathapoorthy (60th birthday) name it; he has supervised, conducted, managed, organized it all. Strong willed and stubborn he was the eldest of eleven. He was the One who had transported each of his siblings time to time from this place i.e Chittur (small village South of India) to all the parts of the world.

‘This is my Home’ he had said as soon as we entered the village. After years of leaving this place and living in Bombay and other parts of the world, life had come a full circle for him. Raising his siblings and getting them settled…engagements, childbirths, stormy marriages, family disagreements …he had seen it all.

For him, this was where he grew up. The character that he built his life on, the smartness, the dexterity everything came from this village he loved and adored. He was most fully and unselfconsciously himself as we passed the unprepared roads. The narrow village ‘thiruvus’(alleys), long dark thinnais (verandahs)with long metal bars were sticking out. Everything seemed to be so serene and calm. Onlookers stared at our cars with curiosity. Very few recognized the once celebrated personality of the village in the car riding proudly. The broken tiles on the roof tops had been once a silent spectator of simple lives people lead considering that there had been a sudden urbanization of the village. Those lovely sleek and shapely vallaku’s(lamp) that once adorned the door steps were displace by the shady bulbs. I knew he was missing those rhythms of light and darkness, sound and silence he once adored in his beloved village. The smell of sambar, vetta kozhambu, poriyal (delicacies) , were missing. As the afternoon sunlight was breaking through the coconut trees, the shouting and yelling that once used to be the way of life here, the famous Iyer accent was all gone. A place that was a circle of arms to many of us, where eyes lit up when we came here for the summer vacations forty years back, today was arid and characterless.

Appa (Dad) was even more excited by now as we neared. “I want to go to the ‘Athangarai’” he reiterated. The ambassador taxi ambled through the narrow alleys and reached the huge banyan tree. We stopped and alighted. My dad drew his cane and helped himself out rather shakily, but there was conviction in his eyes. He moved his cane and stepped out of the car stretched. Looking up at the sun he drew in the fresh air and filled his lungs. I could see he was satisfied.

“This is my home, the country where my heart is. Here is where I dreamt, I hoped and enjoyed.” could hear him mutter.

Appa passed away the following year. I think now he knew that was his last visit to where he spent his childhood. His eyesight was gone, but he experienced every grain of that soil when he walked barefoot on the sand, every smell in the air when he breathed..Life had come a full circle for him. He had visited America for several years to spend his summer with his children at their homes, this time around he had all of them with him at his favorite place…..He was happy!!!!

“ Love where you are. Live where you are. We can only adequately love and belong to the earth, be good stewards of God’s creation, if we can love and belong to our community. We can only live wisely in our chosen place when we recognize its connections to the rest of the world” My dad will always connect me to the Athangarai forever…

Set it free

Oh! gosh, its only day 2 and I am already under pressure to write the next one. I am sure the pressure will be much less as days go by....

Let me start with a Khalil Gibran's quote today:

“You may chain my hands, you may shackle my feet; you may even throw me into a dark prison; but you shall not enslave my thinking, because it is free.”

So rightly said. It is so true, no one can stop you from thinking. But think about it: are we not the prison for our thoughts? we think and think and think....and there are thoughts, thoughts and even more thoughts. Where are they? they are just locked as prisoners with us. Prisoners of our minds.

Thoughts can dance,
Thoughts of a dancer

Thoughts can paint
Thoughts of a painter

Thoughts can dream
Thoughts of a dreamer

So think to be one...

"Consider minds not as prisons but as the windows to the world.Unleash your thoughts and set it free, that will make room for more"

...maybe that is one more reason for my Blog!!