Aging with a Perspective

Growing old, is an age old experience. An experience that is real and realtime, provided we recognize it.We gain perspective once we open up to the understanding, and the profoundness of life will blow us away. It’s like the air we breathe, unless we are conscious about it - we will not recognize it.

As we grow older, lots of things change and every change is a new experience.One thing everyone knows well? Well, Aging. You grow older and soon you realize people close to you start dying. Friends, Family, Relatives and so on…Death is the ultimate giver of perspective. Then there is the other end. Birth. Your children, their kids, your friends kids and so on…These events provides you with a different emotion…
As time flies, you appreciate little things more than before. Everything comes with experience and as a result – with a perspective. Suddenly you don’t complain about your childhood. You are happy with the pocket money you received while you were a kid, enjoyed all the stories you read, all the books, the games, the clothes…your appreciation never ends…when you talk to your kids. Your perspective has given a new meaning and provided you with the richness of the life you had as a child. More importantly, it also dawns on you that, despite of all the wrong things parents have done, they have got a lot of things right too, in fact many….

With a perspective - I can’t complain about my childhood, as I grew up in a decidedly middle-class suburb in living a decidedly middle-class life. While I may have not gotten everything I wanted (for some reason, some of those memories never seem to leave us), I most certainly got everything I needed. Even if it was often a pair of hand-me down clothes from one of my older cousins. At least I had something different to wear.

My dad was the giver…

Not sure when my dad ever took some rest. Family, relatives, friends,kids,wife in that order was the center of his existence. He left by the morning train everyday bright and cheerful, like a man on a mission and came back late evening with some goodies.

My dad always seemed so very proud when one of his kids came to visit him in the office. He’d take us around and introduce us to his co-workers and boss, and he always seemed to lighten up and be very proud of us. My dad was inherently a kind, gentle soul who has a very social and engaging personality. But when growing up, neither us kids or my mom often didn’t see this side of him.

It felt like my dad worked hard at his job, because I don’t remember a lot of interactions with him after work. He seemed tired a lot, and after dinner he would retire to bed. I blamed the job for that, not him, and vowed that I will never to work in a boring office job, sitting at a desk all day and not interact with my kids. (Yes, I get the irony.)

But as a child, we simply take our parents for granted. We don’t know much about them or their personal lives, and understand only a small part of their personality and background. As we grow up, we start learning more and more about them.
As I aged.. many of my friends would remark to me, “Wow, your dad is really great”. “He knows so many people and has such fantastic memory” and I always thought to myself, “Really? My dad??!...and I would be secretly proud.”

I’ve spent far more time with my dad making new memories now I think about it, than I did as a kid, and for that time and those memories, I am eternally grateful.
I’m thankful for my dad, for providing for us early on, allowing us to have all of the things a family needs in order to feel safe, secure and cared for. He provided us not only with the meaning of family, but also with a never-ending supply of love and pride of a dad for his sons and their achievements over the years. I try to appreciate every moment I spend with him now, as such moments dwindle. To all the dads out there, there is hope. Every moment with your kids today will bear fruit someday

As I placed a rose beside my dad’s photo, what bothers me most today, is that I did not write this blog when he was still alive….Happy Fathers Day!!!!!